my story

[NatureHeart]

*Bounces off wall* Love it! Can you still finish this story?

[shadow-wolf]

sure, i made some adjustments tho.... ill to it on microsoft word then paste it on here lol... im sure you will like it! this could be my story channel! lol ill make some changes to my first comment, like notice board etc.!

[shadow-wolf]

here it is! chapter 1, i will post a chapter at a time, that way i can see your posts, and see if i need improvements, also, give ideas and descriptions about what the places should look like and where athena shall go next! :


Chapter 1
The awakening
Athena groaned in pain as she awoke in a dark cave, she was alone. Athena looked around wildly how on earth did I get here!? Suddenly a white wolf came through the entrance of the cave and saw the bewilderment on her face “do not worry yourself Athena, you are safe now” Athena was scared to know how this wolf knew her name, and where she was “Who are you!? And how do you know my name!?” the white wolf laughed at the nervousness in her voice “we always knew about you Athena! We all know about you! We all know about what courage you posses!, you will be a great leader when your older, that’s exactly what we need!” Athena was uncertain about the wolf, but felt a kind of warmth towards her, “ ok then, so if you need a leader, why me?” she asked quizzically the white wolf looked as if she knew the question was coming “ I will tell you a story Athena, sit” she patted the rock beside her, Athena obliged “ many years ago, there was once two brothers, they never got along, always fighting on whom was better than the other, then one day, one of the brothers, Kaeaz, seeked to kill his brother, then he will be the alpha of the pack. Kaeaz mate, zera, overheard her mates rabbling and, went to warn his brother, kuaka. That night there was a battle, a battle that split the pack into two. The moonlit pack and the shadow pack, the years went on till now, the brothers are dead, and both packs need a leader, you Athena, will be our leader, the moonlit pack” athena backed away from the white wolf this is all too much! “ I-I-Im sorry! I think you have the wrong wolf!, im no leader!” she bolted out of the cave, leaping down the rocks I feel stronger! How can this be!? Suddenly, she stopped in surprise as, there in front of her was the wolf! , she looked up, the cliff was to high to jump from “how?...” the wolf stopped her before she said anymore “ I will tell you many secrets, come, I will show you were you will stay…”

[shadow-wolf]

Sooo... What do ya think? I really need some ideas...plz tell me what u want athenas room should look like.... Maby if the white Wolf tutors her in a room, u tell me that, also, tell me other things! Guys, I need ideas!! U MUST tell me! Plz guys!!

[NatureHeart]

Wonderful!

[StarWolf]

Helpful tips:
When switching between 2 characters talking, use the enter key(aka, indenting). Example:

Fenris sniffed the cold morning's air, shivering slightly as the dawn's moist breeze ruffled through his fur. The youth's calm brown eyes surveyed the trees above him, keen to find his target. "I know you're there," He muttered in a low voice. "Come on out already..." His head whipped around when he heard a chuckle, his brown eyes narrowing at the lithe white figure stepping around silently in the undergrowth.
"So you can see me," purred the figure as it stepped out from the ivy infested bushes. It's yellow eyes were narrowed in a challenge. "Let's see if you can attack me then..."

See, when the white figure spoke, it's separated with an indention. That way, the reader can keep track of who/what is talking and when.
Also, use some sort of thing to show when it's the character's thoughts, versus when the character is speaking out loud. You can use italics within the "quotation" marks, or the 'smaller' quotation if you don't have a program that supports selective italics(for whatever reason...).

Hope that helps. ^-^

[shadow-wolf]

It was soposed to but when I posted it, it messed up... Like I. Said... Any ideas for descriptions on places, characters ect. Mabey the white wolfs history?

[StarWolf]

Hm... I can try to think of some ideas. I have 3 story ideas all in my head right now, so if I have any ideas that don't fit any of mine, I'll tell you. If I tried to think of ideas for your story all on its own, it would probably evolve into a huge jigsaw puzzle of complex ideas and by then I would start writing parts of it on my own. ._.
Oh, and you can highlight text in the WEO text box and then click the italicized i to do a quick italics on a multiple words. Just another tip(probably a useless one, but oh well).

[Summerbreeze]

Nice detail, I liked it.

[shadow-wolf]

Thx, But I wos really hoping I could mabye have readers involved , to keep it interesting... Mabye not then... Ill make the rest when Im well enough to get on my pc - if ya wanna know why Im ill it is because I was bitten by a dog when posting leaflets for a charity... I had to drag my had outta its jaws and it caused a fractured finger with swelling and a deep canien bite in my index finger. Ouch... But the fracture is healing, Im using my other Hand to Type on my phone so... XD alls good....

[Summerbreeze]

On topic: Oh ok. I really do think the story was good.
Off topic: What breed was the dog? We have a pitbull but he is too stupid and too sweet to bite people.

[shadow-wolf]

Beleve it or not it was a spanil - springer spanil - last time i got hurt by a dog it was a cocker spanil... Its extendible lead wrapped around my legs and cut them open, this happens when I was 5 But they have shrunk by Now and u can bairly see them xD