Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

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Scarikas
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Location: Rait behind yoo >:3

Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Scarikas »

Hey, I was writing this Minecraft story and I thought I'd post it here for some criticism or comments on how I can improve it.
So, I'll just copy+paste it in..
*clickie*
I'm only going to paste some of it. If you guys don't like it, there's no use in me pasting anymore of it.
!REALLY IMPORTANT!
In this story, I imagine myself as a cat rather then a Minecraft character, but I still behave like a human. Like making tools, and building houses, etc etc.
I also highly recommend that if you don't know what Minecraft is you do NOT read this story until you do. Thank you.


(This is a true story made in a Minecraft save file called "Aurora")
(Every single bit of it is true, but I may make up some things during monster fight scenes only to make it more interesting, but everything else is true.)

The rain dripped down from the black night sky, growls from zombies
below could be heard. I was huddled in my floating house,
connected to the ground by only a ladder. I was safe, but a roof
would have done me good. I noticed my house's wall was only 2
high, and I would not be able to sleep. But I wanted a roof...
Perhaps I could build myself a temporary one.
I decided to do so, the roof casting a sudden shadow over me and
making water drip and subtle in the light. While I was out earlier,
I had found a 1-coal vein, unlucky of the size, and now I made a
torch. Placed carelessly under the tiny roof that covered only me
and the torch itself. It's light pushed away the shadow of the roof,
and I was left alone in the light of my only piece of coal.
Hungry, and cold.

My violet eyes opened, the sky was clouded with orange paint,
dawn settling in on my world. My tail was soaking wet, rain still
drizzling down in tiny droplets. The only thing slightly warm
was my head, the closest to the still burning torch and it hurt to
get up.
I knew now that morning came I had to get up. Then I could cut
some trees down, and make a roof. Then I would be warm. Cold, work,
then warmth. Hunger still pulled at my stomach, and I forced
myself down the ladder of my small, incomplete, pathetic abode.
By the time I had gotten home it was surprisingly, still raining.
I started to expect where I lived was just a rainy environment.
When out, I had gotten a bountiful amount of wood and was ready to
build my roof. I had also found a very, very large coal vein,
which had made up for the small one I had first mined.
By the time I was done with the roof, I had eaten a cooked chicken
from my newly built furnace and the rain had stopped. I was starting
to dry, but when I looked outside another problem had hit me.
There was not an animal in sight. The chicken had about half-filled
me, but I doubt it would last another day. I had to find food,
and fast. I traveled back to my first spawn-point, in hopes
to find food. The first animals I saw were 3 chickens, an egg
lying in between. Maybe someday I could make a bucket, then a cake
to last me longer.
Traveling further, I spotted a pig through the leaves of a tree.
It was a thick forest here, and that was exactly
why I had moved out of it. Seeing through it was too hard,
so I pursued the pig and continued my search.
Soon after killing the first pig, I saw a herd through the brush.


I sat, my back leaning against my workbench. I was waiting for some
pork to cook, and my hunger tore at me once again. The sun was
sinking behind the hills and the moon was rising on the other side.
I looked out the hole in my house, the orange sky drowning the
sun on it's horizon, birds flying through the air, grass swishing
in music with the wind as the soft song of the minecraft world played
to ease every animal's ear. My violet eyes sparkled against it,
my pure-black fur rustled in the breeze. My long limbs tucked
beneath me as I lay down, my long sleek tail swishing behind me.
Endercat in a world where there is an end, waiting so slowly for it.
The end where there is no escape but to die, an end where I would
someday belong. An end where there is no sun or moon, an end where
I would be surrounded by my sister's and brothers, chased by my
mother, fighting for myself. The end was so close but so far, I
could feel it in my paw-pads.
I pushed the thought away, and the smell of pork lifted through
my nostrils. I took a glance at my stove, I knew the pork would last
me at least another day or two, but I would run out. and lying down
on this wood floor was not the answer. The sun went down, and the
sky as black as my fur glinted in stars, just like glints of dark
grey could be seen on me only in the sunlight, grey no human had
ever seen on an end creature, those specs of light Endermen carried
that only they knew about. Making that philosopher's stone back in
the old earth wasn't made from Endermen blood, I would never have
killed my own kind. It was horrid watching them die though, doing
nothing. I do recall one time one had fallen in the water, back
before we had the ability to escape from it, and I had tried
to push it free, only to fail and watch it die at my very paws.
It was a painful life I had here, but it was the only one I had.
And from then on, I think, laying my head down on my paws, watching
the night sky turn and shine over the horizon, I would work to
make my life better, until I finally had the chance to worry about
the end that races towards us so quickly but so far away.



Though it was night, I figured there was no time to waste. I would
have to get myself downstairs and start collecting, while I was
still full. Even if it was only a little, I would have to make some
sort of wheat supply. Maybe, I should just place 3 out near the
water and give it a fence, because I am running out of time.

Before going out, I decided to take inventory.
I had one feather, 2 seeds, 3 saplings, 28 coal, a cobblestone block,
a wool block, 4 dirt blocks, 3 planks, a ladder, 3 torches, a wood
pickaxe and a stone pickaxe, a wood sword and a stone sword, a wood
axe, two eggs, three roses, and some gunpowder. I didn't need
most of this stuff, but I didn't have a chest yet. And 3 planks
wouldn't do me much good. I would lumber while I was out.
I looked around, I saw 3 creepers and a spider on the opposite side
of the pond next to my house, and when I looked the other way
I thought I saw one of my own kind, but when I approached the
location it was gone.
When I looked back, only one creeper remained and it looked at me
and disappeared, so that left the spider. went over and killed it,
but upon returning to my house it was swarmed with spiders. I may
die today. I paused my senses, thinking about what I could do.
Maybe I could jump in the water, to give myself an advantage, then
use my wood blocks to build up, so right then I lunged myself
into the water as two of the spiders came running after me.
I noticed where I had jumped was too deep, so I just fought them
off with my sword, the slowness of the water giving me easier focus.
While batting them away when they got too close, I looked back to
my house to see at least 2 spiders around the ladder. While diving
down for the loot of the two that had chased me and died, I had
another idea. I had never heard of a mob swimming down after you
in water, and have never had something chase me all the same. Maybe
if I stayed underwater, I could easily kill them from below. So,
I tried it.
My plan worked, as I shrunk down into the water the two spiders
dangled, confused, above me. I tried to hit them away so I could
go up for air.
The ring of experience afterwards satisfied me, and I looked around
before completely leaving the shore. I collected some plants, hoping
to find a third seed, but couldn't find one. I looked around once
more, a zombie had just spawned on a cliff and there were two
skeletons below him, one following the other. I couldn't tell if they
were fighting each other or just plain traveling together. Next
to them was a spider, and on the other side of the lake a creeper
lurked. I decided to stay in my house for tonight. Maybe I could
fish, though. When I got inside, after making the rod, I stood on
the edge of my doorway and watched the moon set, orange quickly
soaking up the sky. I shot my rod, hoping for fish, watching the
horizon, and seeing my brothers and sisters teleport constantly
before going back to the end realm. Unlike them, I lacked the ability
to teleport, and I was much smaller, but I still had the eyes and
the familiar fur color, and maybe even the same intent, but I still
differ from them alot, and even with this I still consider myself
a part of their world, even if they don't. As morning settled in,
the peaceful music returned, echoing sweet piano thought the world.
I decided to turn my render distanced up, I couldn't miss this
beautiful sunrise.
I hopped to the top of the hill, the sky purple, I had never
seen the sunrise like this to this music. Behind these mountains,
over this hill, in the cloudless sky, the monsters casting
flames and orange into the air. The music settled into a more
peaceful, deep piano. It was the most beautiful thing I had
ever experienced. The piano started to sound almost sad, and
faded into beautiful violin, but so
peaceful, It almost made me cry.

This world belonged to I,
And I belonged to this world.





Now that the sun had risen, I was out gathering lumber. I had
eaten a spider eye to make my hunger full, us Endermen were able
to eat grotesque foods and able to ignore it, though it still
poisoned me. I was going to make my small farm today, so I could
attract some animals into this area. Or, maybe, I could just
live on fish for the rest of my life. That would be easy, since
spiders are in all areas, but making a farm would be smart too.
Before starting, I decided to fish a little. I would need all the
food I could get. I caught a fish in the first five seconds, and
mysteriously, while it flew into me I thought I heard the hiss of a
spider, but it sounded too short and cut-off. Maybe I imagined it,
or maybe there was a cave nearby.
My string caught on something heavy and hard, interrupting my
thoughts, and almost dragged me straight off the shore. I reeled,
pulling hard, and a small squid shot out of the water furiously.
It went back down with a splash, and I fell over backwards in
surprise. Squid? Here? It wasn't THAT close to the ocean, I just
lived in a swampy environment and I expected to be far from the
ocean shore. The squid were tiny, though, so maybe they were just
attracted because I was down in the water collecting spider loot
earlier. Interesting. I continued to fish, checking the sky for
the hours of day I had left.

The squid had gone, and I turned around to see if I could
just fish in the little pond instead of the bay that churned
in around my house. I spotted a pile of clay in the pond, but what
would I use it for? I wouldn't ruin the flat balance of my pond
by taking out something I didn't need. Maybe I could use it to
decorate my house, but that would take a lot to make brick. Thinking
of this, I turned around for a split second to look at my house.
While I did, I heard a sudden splash and instinctively reeled
in my fishing rod without looking back, and a fish went splashing
onto the shore. I impressed myself with this, but I knew that it
wasn't as a special feat. as I thought it was.

I sat there fishing again, everything was so silent I thought my
audio was turned off, until the splash of a fish ruined the quiet
of which I reeled in and splashed onto the shore. 6 fish, that
would be enough to last me. Maybe being a fisher wasn't so bad
after all.

Anyway, I got back up into my house and cooked my fish, There was
some pork left over from last night but I figured I'd save that.
While the fish cooked, I made a double chest and a door our of the
wood I had gotten and reorganized my house so I could place two
furnaces next to each other, the double chest on the other side,
and the workbench in the middle. With this, my house would look
awesome.
I made a bow, and stored it along with some things I didn't need
at the time. I made some more torches, and stored the rest of the
coal just in case. By the time I was done, It was already dark
outside. I sighed, Maybe I'de have enough luck tonight to get another
piece of wool. I stored my rod, and idiotically ran out for sheep
like Leeroy Jenkins.

After exploring a bit, I came around a giant mountain and found a
large amount of cows. So this was where they were all hiding!
There was water below a cliff, I didn't know if I'de be lucky
enough to survive, but I looked for a deep area then launched myself
off into it.
I survived easily, and ventured forth. As I was coming over a
hillside, I got passed a pine but then received an arrow in my
elbow, this almost gave me a heart attack and made me shrink back
behind the mound. I readied my sword, ripped the arrow out, and
lunged myself towards the attacker. I tried to climb up the mound
once more, slipped, and fell down on my paws ungracefully. This
gave my attacker the first move, and he launched out over my head
and pounced onto me, stabbing me with yet another arrow. I shook
him off, and pursued him with a sword clamped in my mouth. I slashed
it across his ribcage, knocking a few of his ribs out, and he threw
his arrow against my hand, not letting go, but swiping the sword out.
I watched it spin away and land in the water, And while my head was
turned towards it an arrow swiped across it, hitting it over to
the other direction and knocking me off my forepaws. In panic, I
swiped my claws in front of his face, making him flinch, and
desperately pounced into him, I felt another arrow stab into MY
ribcage, and I reflected off of him with a yowl. As I caught my
breath and recoiled, he lost his balance from my throw and tumbled
off the side of the mountain, landing a few feet down with the
crunch of his spine. Immediately, I ran to get my sword and readied
in case he came back, but there was no sound. I looked over the edge
and his bones were laying in pieces, So I crawled down and ripped
out a few to make sure he would stay dead, and collected them
for myself. I also tore the blood-stained arrow from his hands,
and collected it as my prize. I licked a wound, and ate two of the
there fish I had taken with me on the journey. I also had some
steak from an earlier killed cow, but now I looked around and
realized I was too far from home. Wounds lined my side, and I knew
that I wouldn't make it until morning. With this, I dug a hole with
my bare hands, in the side of the mountain, shaped it into a room, and curled up
with a torch at my side, the exit closed and sealed.

I poked my head out, wonderful music played with bells sounded,
and the stars spun in the sky as I turned my render up. The moon
was 2/3 full, but shining. My ability to see in the dark allowed
me observation of the beautiful landscape before me. I hopped out,
plain to see the beautiful observation of the world, my eyes wide.
And I closed them as a night breeze ruffled my fur. This was my
world, and I would stay here until the end. I left the opening
exposed, and the music faded away as I curled up inside my warm
hole and stared out into the sky, sleep drifting into my mind.



The next morning I traveled next to a wonderful winding river
back to what I now call "Spawn forest". It would be my first area
of spawn, and I wished that I had instead made my house
next to that beautiful V-shaped canyon, but I didn't regret making
it next to this bay, that I was now traveling through and going
up the ladder to my house. My sense of direction decided not to
fail me, and I thanked it. On the way home, spawn forest offered
me the long-awaited sheep, but one more wool was still needed.
Maybe tomorrow I could get some. So I curled up in my house,
my long tail fluffed up around me, and fell asleep on the hard wood.


The next morning, I had run out of durability for my tools and ran off to get cobble. Hopping through the lake, I searched around the nearby mountain to find a coal vein in the side. I dug into it, gathering the coal, and decided to start branch mining for iron. Hacking my pick into the wall and starting the first tunnel. I ran out of torches, but continued to dig. I had slight night vision, being an endercat, and the little light of the daylight helped too...
I would be fine...
Eh? What was that?
I started to hear footsteps, very slight footsteps. And then the sound of rocks breaking. I had no idea what it was, but whatever it was, It probably wasn't good. I wish I had some light, but it wasn't a very good time to think about that. I backed up. Putting away my tools, I readied my bow, and aimed at the blank stone wall where the sound was coming from, looking for the slightest trace of movement. It was probably a monster from a nearby cave. But breaking blocks? I'd never heard of that. Perhaps an enderman would be moving blocks, but this sound... Yes, it was the sound of a pickaxe. "No, it couldn't be." I whispered. The sound of my own voice startled me, for I had not spoken in a very long time. I readied my bow, pulling the string back. Suddenly, my senses tensed as a crack in the stone before me formed, and a dark figure was revealed, Just as I expected. I let go of the tension in the bow, the arrow solidly hitting the figure.
"AHH, MY KNEE!" The figure yowled. I jumped, my fur sticking out. It spoke! The sound startled me so much that I almost passed out, but It was just then I realized it had a pickaxe grasped firmly in it's jaws, using it to dig into the ground, and placing a cobblestone block above it, sealing it in. Vanished. I stepped forward cautiously and looked down at the cobblestone block. feint, muffled murmuring could be heard through the stone ground. I couldn't believe it. Another soul, in my world, in a place like this? Looking down the hallway, I recognized a torch. I didn't place that, neither did I dig this tunnel. There was no doubt about it, that figure with the green eyes was another cat.

"Hello?" I murmured down at the stone block. A moment later, I heard a feint mumble, then the sound of more blocks breaking.
"FFF..."
"Hey scarey enderthingy!"
My tail puffed up, even bigger then before.
"Have a spare pick?"
"Can you understand english?"
I stared down at the cobblestone block, The cobblestone block was talking to me! Oh no wait, that was the cat.
"Wh-Who's there..." I murmured down at the block.
"Do you have a spare pick?" It mumbled again. To think about it, I
didn't.
"N-No..." I squeaked at the sound.
I checked my inventory, I had a very low durability wooden one, about to break.. Agh, that didn't matter. I was talking to another miner in this singleplayer world. It couldn't... Nagh, Reality! Must stick.. To reality!
"Okay... If you can talk I'm assuming you can reason."
"Slowly remove the cobblestone block, and we can talk."
"But don't try anything funny, I have my sword out. I have fought endermen before! I-I can take you on!"
How pathetic.
Like he said, I swung my pick down, ridding of the cobblestone. I shut my eyes tight, almost hoping not to see the face of whatever was below the cobblestone block, hoping that I all just imagined it, but I forced my eyes open, and looked down.
Looking down into the hole, All I saw was black shadows. I almost forced myself to pretend nothing was down there, but my eyes adjusted to see it clearly. And down there, I saw it. I saw the figure clearly.
Before me, a grey cat with light green tail-tip, light green ear-tips and light green paws was looking up at me, his ears flat against his head in fear. I doubted I looked any braver then he did.
His eyes widened, and I heard him whisper; "It's.... Another cat?"
"Hello up there."
"I assume... You're friendly?"
The sudden attitude change allowed my ears to rise again and my fur to relax completely, I had a feeling this tom wouldn't hurt me. I only stared blankly, unable to speak.
The cat looked down at his knee, of which I had earlier shot with an arrow.
"I do believe I am injured."
"Dastardly arrows, them."
I swallowed, and forced myself to talk.
"Uh... S-Sorry about Th-that..." I stuttered, fear in my voice. I still couldn't believe what I was seeing. "It's fine... it'll heal in due time." He said.
I flinched as I watch him grasp the arrow in his jaws, and tear it out. He let out a yowl of pain, then eased, dropping the arrow.
"Do me a favor and head back to my mining base. I have some wood and supplies. Make me a few ladders, torches, and pick, will you?"
I stared, and shook my head irritably, interrupting.
"Wait... What are you doing here? How'd you get into my save?"
"Magic." he replied.


I stared for a few more seconds, before mewing. "First of all, who are you?" slowly gaining my assertiveness back.
"I am Emertxe, an Architect, Sniper, and explorer. I was starting a mine when I needed some stone for supplies."
"How long have you been here?" I asked, suddenly curious.
"I've been here a day or so, passing by..."
Emertxe looked down at his knee, then answered "That's not happening any time soon. Do you have a dwelling I may stay at?"
"Of course, I'm sorry about your knee. I thought you were a monster." I said firmly, my fear fading.
"It's... fine... but I do require medical attention" he replied.
"I can go to your base, or mine to get the ladders."
"Where it be?"
"The other way." He replied. I looked down the tunnel he had come from, and looked down to him, nodded, and placed a cobblestone block so that if monsters did get in, they couldn't get him.
Continuing down the tunnel, I emerged through the other side to see
a door. Opening it, I found a little abode with a chest, a furnace,
and a workbench. In the chest remained a few tools and supplies.
Most of the tools were made out of wood, hinting that he had just
started. I looked down at the workbench, and took some of the planks that I had to make 6 ladders for him to get up, and I went
back through the open door and back.
"Hey, what's with the cobble?! Hello? Are you still out there?" I heard him meow, muffled through the stone floor. I destroyed the cobble, and looked down at him. I threw down a stone pick I made while in his base.
"Okay, thanks." he responded promptly.
"What is your name?" He asked upon escaping the pit.
"Arma, I come from the end realm." I replied firmly.
"Why aren't you with your fellow enderfriends?" He asked.
I looked down at my paws, my tail waving slightly.
"Cause I'm different" I replied after a pause.
"Ahh, I see. Do you have a dwelling within this vicinity?" He mewed.
"Yes, It's very near here." I responded. I should let him rest there,
especially of the condition he was in.
"May I please rest in your home? You know..." he mewed, looking down at his injured knee. I felt a sudden stab of sympathy and guilt.
"Of course, follow me if you can." I said. I started to walk, before looking at him, limping in the back of the cave.
"Do you need help?" I asked.
"Yes, please." He replied, continuing to limp towards me.
I ran back to him, and let him rest his injured side on my shoulder
as we walked. When we had finally reached the exit of the cave, where
I had come in, there was a downpour of rain. I helped him around the lake, but by the time we had gotten to the birch tree next to my house there was a creeper lurking at the edge of my house's ladder. I asked my new friend to stay behind while I attempted killing it, but it had exploded at the base anyway. I was far enough to survive, but still injured. Ignoring the wound, I ran back and continued to help Emertxe back up into my base.
"Do you... Have a bed I could rest on?" He asked me once we had climbed up the ladder.
I looked at the ground, uncertain. "No, Not yet."
"I see you have 2 cloth blocks, I have another block in my base."
"You should go fetch it, You can have everything in my base."
"I'd do it myself but..." He paused, looking down at his injured knee.
"Sorry, I'll go." I interrupted.
"I'll be back"
"Meanwhile, eat these"
I threw 3 of the earlier gotten fish I had stored in my chest.
"Okay, Thanks." He meowed, crouching down to start the first fish.
I climbed down the ladder, jumping off at the bottom, and started to
walk towards the entrance to his base I had seen while going to make tools for Emertxe. I still couldn't believe how Emertxe could have ended up in my save file, In this little single-player world of mine. It was frustrating that none of us knew how this happened, but we would figure it out someday. We? Was I intending that he would stay long? Well, It was lonely in this world of mine. Maybe...



It was the next day now, I was sitting on the edge of my ladder, a fishing rod cast out over the edge. I had made a bed from the wool I had gathered and taken from Emertxe's chest. I had no luck with the fishing, too many things were on my mind. Behind me, Emertxe was curled up, sleeping in the bed I had made. I wondered what Teppelin was like. Now that I thought of it, the name sounded sort of familiar, like something I've heard from someone before.

"Good mornin." I heard Emertxe's mew from behind me.
"Wha'cha doin?" He meowed drowsily.
I wondered on how long he intended to stay. It would be nice to have a neighbor here that wasn't a brainless animal or a monster trying to kill me.
I had thought Emertxe was still sitting on the bed, but that thought soon betrayed me when I felt the fur of his fluffy tail brush against my leg.
"Ah!" I mewed, turning my head to realize he was sitting right beside me. I then noticed I hadn't answered his question.
"Fishing." I corrected myself.
"Ahh, got any coal? I'd like to smelt the iron I found if that's
okay with you." He asked.
"Yeah, sure." I said, putting down my rod. I briskly trotted over to my chest and took out some coal, and slid it into the pit of one of my furnaces for him.
"Okay, thanks." He mewed in response.
I continued to fish, but still had no luck. Maybe they just weren't biting...
"Here, let me try." He was sitting beside me again suddenly, surprising me as he had before. I wondered how much my thoughts had blocked my hearing.
"Oh, mmk." I replied, handing him the fishing rod. He traded places with me, limping slowly to the doorway and casting the rod. I sat beside him, and watched. Not too long later, the bait of the rod went below the surface, and a fish came flying back at us.
"Got gone." He meowed.
"Oh, Nice." I complimented.
Some light faded from the room, and I noticed his iron was done.
I opened the furnace, and took it out while he continued to fish.
"Here's your iron" I said, throwing it to his inventory.
"Thanks." he said. Shortly after, another fish came flying to his feet.
"Another one." He said upon collecting it.
"Awesome."
Not too long later, another fish had come.
"Nice, You're a way better fisherman then me" I said.
"Thank you."
"You know... I kinda like this place. You wouldn't mind if I... become your neighbor?" He asked.
"I wouldn't mind at all" I said, honest in my words. It was too lonely here to say no.
"It's great having company here." I spoke my thoughts.
"A break from exploring, a place to settle down." He mewed.
"And... How exactly did you get here anyway?" I said, still curious.
"I... Don't know..." He mewed.
"I Just... Well I remember walking away from Teppelin to explore"
"and then I woke up in a forest" He finished, staring at the ground. I could tell I wasn't the only one who was confused.

Should I add anything? Remove anything? Should I paste in more of my story?
Please tell me if you liked it or not.
Last edited by Scarikas on Fri Jan 06, 2012 2:37 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by SilentEcho »

It seems fine to me, waiting on the next part :3
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Døøm Dragøn »

I like it very much. There are some grammar issues and some places got a bit confusing, but I was able to figure it out. Don't worry, grammar is not my strongest point either.
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Scarikas »

It's rushed because I was writing while I played.
Part 2 will be even more rushed, because I won't be able to pause...
You'll see why :wink:
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Lysander »

that

was.

AMAZING! :D

I also caught an arrow to the knee thing.

hee hee
Hee
Hee....
hello. my name is gabriel and sometimes i draw
my art: http://drhastielanyon.tumblr.com/
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Extreme360
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Extreme360 »

Lysander wrote:that

was.

AMAZING! :D

I also caught an arrow to the knee thing.

hee hee
Hee
Hee....
I used to mine cobble, but then I took a Scarikas to the knee. Well, at least I actually found some iron in that hidey hole I dug. Image
How did I get here? ಠ_ಠ

My school's water fountain caught on fire. Your argument is invalid.
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Extreme360
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Extreme360 »

By the way, but I revised your story a little. I got too tired so I'm heading to bed, but I plan to finish the whole thing. Unfortunately, your story is 5,000 words long and 11 pages, so it might take a while. The only thing I got done so far is the revision of the first two paragraphs and the removal of all the line skips, so it doesn't look so squashed up in the beginning before you used word warp. There were a few things that I didn't understand, so I wrote it how I interpreted it. I hope you don't mind.

Code: Select all

The rain dripped down from the black night sky and growls from zombies below could be heard. I was huddled in my floating house, connected to the ground by only a ladder. I was safe, but a roof would have done me good. I noticed my house's wall was only 2 high, so I would not be able to sleep.  I wanted a roof...Perhaps I could build myself a temporary one. I decided to do so. The roof cast a sudden shadow over me, making water drip and subdue in the light. While I was out earlier, I had found a 1-coal vein. Quite an unlucky size, but it provided me with a torch. I placed it carelessly under the tiny roof that covered only me and the torch itself. Its light pushed away the shadow of the roof, leaving me alone in the light of my only piece of coal; hungry, and cold.

My violet eyes opened. The sky was clouded with an orange glint, settling dawn in on my world. My tail was soaking wet, rain still drizzling down in tiny droplets. The only thing slightly warm was my head, the closest to the still burning torch. It hurt to get up. I knew now that morning came, I have to arise. I needed to cut some trees down and make a roof. Then I would be warm. Cold, work, and then warmth. Hunger still pulled at my stomach.  I forced myself down the ladder of my small, incomplete, pathetic abode and headed out into the wilderness. By the time I had gotten home it was surprisingly still raining. I started to expect where I live was just a rainy environment. While I was out, I had gotten a bountiful amount of wood and was ready to build my roof. I had also found a very, very large coal vein, which had made up for the small one I had first mined. By the time I was done with the roof, I had eaten a cooked chicken from my newly built furnace. By then, the rain had stopped. I was starting to dry, but when I looked outside another problem had occurred to me. There was not an animal in sight. The chicken had only filled up me about half way, but I doubt it would last another day. I had to find food, and fast. I traveled back to my first spawn-point, in hopes to find food. The first animals I saw were 3 chickens with an egg lying in between. Maybe someday I could make a bucket to make a cake. It would last me longer. Traveling further, I spotted a pig through the leaves of a tree. It was a thick forest here. That was exactly the reason I had moved out of it. Seeing through it was hard, but I continued my search and pursuit of the pig. Soon after killing it, I saw a herd through the brush.
(I only revised those first two. The rest, I just pasted because I removed the line skips.)

Code: Select all

I sat, my back leaning against my workbench. I was waiting for some pork to cook, and my hunger tore at me once again. The sun was sinking behind the hills and the moon was rising on the other side.I looked out the hole in my house, the orange sky drowning the sun on it's horizon, birds flying through the air, grass swishing in music with the wind as the soft song of the minecraft world playedto ease every animal's ear. My violet eyes sparkled against it, my pure-black fur rustled in the breeze. My long limbs tucked beneath me as I lay down, my long sleek tail swishing behind me. Endercat in a world where there is an end, waiting so slowly for it. The end where there is no escape but to die, an end where I would someday belong. An end where there is no sun or moon, an end where I would be surrounded by my sister's and brothers, chased by my mother, fighting for myself. The end was so close but so far, I could feel it in my paw-pads. I pushed the thought away, and the smell of pork lifted through my nostrils. I took a glance at my stove, I knew the pork would last me at least another day or two, but I would run out. and lying down on this wood floor was not the answer. The sun went down, and the sky as black as my fur glinted in stars, just like glints of dark grey could be seen on me only in the sunlight, grey no human had ever seen on an end creature, those specs of light Endermen carried that only they knew about. Making that philosopher's stone back in the old earth wasn't made from Endermen blood, I would never have killed my own kind. It was horrid watching them die though, doing nothing. I do recall one time one had fallen in the water, back before we had the ability to escape from it, and I had tried to push it free, only to fail and watch it die at my very paws. It was a painful life I had here, but it was the only one I had. And from then on, I think, laying my head down on my paws, watching the night sky turn and shine over the horizon, I would work to make my life better, until I finally had the chance to worry about the end that races towards us so quickly but so far away.

Though it was night, I figured there was no time to waste. I would have to get myself downstairs and start collecting, while I was still full. Even if it was only a little, I would have to make some sort of wheat supply. Maybe, I should just place 3 out near the water and give it a fence, because I am running out of time.
Before going out, I decided to take inventory. I had one feather, 2 seeds, 3 saplings, 28 coal, a cobblestone block, a wool block, 4 dirt blocks, 3 planks, a ladder, 3 torches, a wood pickaxe and a stone pickaxe, a wood sword and a stone sword, a wood axe, two eggs, three roses, and some gunpowder. I didn't need most of this stuff, but I didn't have a chest yet. And 3 planks wouldn't do me much good. I would lumber while I was out. I looked around, I saw 3 creepers and a spider on the opposite side of the pond next to my house, and when I looked the other way I thought I saw one of my own kind, but when I approached the location it was gone. When I looked back, only one creeper remained and it looked at me and disappeared, so that left the spider. went over and killed it, but upon returning to my house it was swarmed with spiders. I may die today. I paused my senses, thinking about what I could do. Maybe I could jump in the water, to give myself an advantage, then use my wood blocks to build up, so right then I lunged myself into the water as two of the spiders came running after me. I noticed where I had jumped was too deep, so I just fought them off with my sword, the slowness of the water giving me easier focus. While batting them away when they got too close, I looked back to my house to see at least 2 spiders around the ladder. While diving down for the loot of the two that had chased me and died, I had another idea. I had never heard of a mob swimming down after you in water, and have never had something chase me all the same. Maybe if I stayed underwater, I could easily kill them from below. So, I tried it. My plan worked, as I shrunk down into the water the two spiders dangled, confused, above me. I tried to hit them away so I could go up for air. The ring of experience afterwards satisfied me, and I looked around before completely leaving the shore. I collected some plants, hoping to find a third seed, but couldn't find one. I looked around once more, a zombie had just spawned on a cliff and there were two skeletons below him, one following the other. I couldn't tell if they were fighting each other or just plain traveling together. Next to them was a spider, and on the other side of the lake a creeper lurked. I decided to stay in my house for tonight. Maybe I could fish, though. When I got inside, after making the rod, I stood on the edge of my doorway and watched the moon set, orange quickly soaking up the sky. I shot my rod, hoping for fish, watching the horizon, and seeing my brothers and sisters teleport constantly before going back to the end realm. Unlike them, I lacked the ability to teleport, and I was much smaller, but I still had the eyes and the familiar fur color, and maybe even the same intent, but I still differ from them alot, and even with this I still consider myself a part of their world, even if they don't. As morning settled in, the peaceful music returned, echoing sweet piano thought the world. I decided to turn my render distanced up, I couldn't miss this beautiful sunrise. I hopped to the top of the hill, the sky purple, I had never seen the sunrise like this to this music. Behind these mountains, over this hill, in the cloudless sky, the monsters casting flames and orange into the air. The music settled into a more peaceful, deep piano. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever experienced. The piano started to sound almost sad, and faded into beautiful violin, but so peaceful, It almost made me cry.

This world belonged to I, 

And I belonged to this world.

Now that the sun had risen, I was out gathering lumber. I had eaten a spider eye to make my hunger full, us Endermen were able to eat grotesque foods and able to ignore it, though it still poisoned me. I was going to make my small farm today, so I could attract some animals into this area. Or, maybe, I could just live on fish for the rest of my life. That would be easy, since spiders are in all areas, but making a farm would be smart too. Before starting, I decided to fish a little. I would need all the food I could get. I caught a fish in the first five seconds, and mysteriously, while it flew into me I thought I heard the hiss of a spider, but it sounded too short and cut-off. Maybe I imagined it, or maybe there was a cave nearby. My string caught on something heavy and hard, interrupting my thoughts, and almost dragged me straight off the shore. I reeled, pulling hard, and a small squid shot out of the water furiously. It went back down with a splash, and I fell over backwards in surprise. Squid? Here? It wasn't THAT close to the ocean, I just lived in a swampy environment and I expected to be far from the ocean shore. The squid were tiny, though, so maybe they were just attracted because I was down in the water collecting spider loot earlier. Interesting. I continued to fish, checking the sky for the hours of day I had left. The squid had gone, and I turned around to see if I could just fish in the little pond instead of the bay that churned in around my house. I spotted a pile of clay in the pond, but what would I use it for? I wouldn't ruin the flat balance of my pond by taking out something I didn't need. Maybe I could use it to decorate my house, but that would take a lot to make brick. Thinking of this, I turned around for a split second to look at my house. While I did, I heard a sudden splash and instinctively reeled in my fishing rod without looking back, and a fish went splashing onto the shore. I impressed myself with this, but I knew that it wasn't as a special feat. as I thought it was. 

I sat there fishing again, everything was so silent I thought my audio was turned off, until the splash of a fish ruined the quiet of which I reeled in and splashed onto the shore. 6 fish, that would be enough to last me. Maybe being a fisher wasn't so bad after all.

Anyway, I got back up into my house and cooked my fish, There was some pork left over from last night but I figured I'd save that. While the fish cooked, I made a double chest and a door our of the wood I had gotten and reorganized my house so I could place two furnaces next to each other, the double chest on the other side, and the workbench in the middle. With this, my house would look awesome. I made a bow, and stored it along with some things I didn't need at the time. I made some more torches, and stored the rest of the coal just in case. By the time I was done, It was already dark outside. I sighed, Maybe I'de have enough luck tonight to get another piece of wool. I stored my rod, and idiotically ran out for sheep like Leeroy Jenkins. After exploring a bit, I came around a giant mountain and found a large amount of cows. So this was where they were all hiding! There was water below a cliff, I didn't know if I'de be lucky enough to survive, but I looked for a deep area then launched myself off into it. I survived easily, and ventured forth. As I was coming over a  hillside, I got passed a pine but then received an arrow in my elbow, this almost gave me a heart attack and made me shrink back behind the mound. I readied my sword, ripped the arrow out, and lunged myself towards the attacker. I tried to climb up the mound once more, slipped, and fell down on my paws ungracefully. This gave my attacker the first move, and he launched out over my head and pounced onto me, stabbing me with yet another arrow. I shook him off, and pursued him with a sword clamped in my mouth. I slashed it across his ribcage, knocking a few of his ribs out, and he threw his arrow against my hand, not letting go, but wiping the sword out. I watched it spin away and land in the water, And while my head was turned towards it an arrow swiped across it, hitting it over to the other direction and knocking me off my forepaws. In panic, I swiped my claws in front of his face, making him flinch, and desperately pounced into him, I felt another arrow stab into MY ribcage, and I reflected off of him with a yowl. As I caught my breath and recoiled, he lost his balance from my throw and tumbled off the side of the mountain, anding a few feet down with the crunch of his spine. Immediately, I ran to get my sword and readied in case he came back, but there was no sound. I looked over the edge and his bones were laying in pieces, So I crawled down and ripped out a few to make sure he would stay dead, and collected them for myself. I also tore the blood-stained arrow from his hands, and collected it as my prize. I licked a wound, and ate two of the there fish I had taken with me on the journey. I also had some steak from an earlier killed cow, but now I looked around and realized I was too far from home. Wounds lined my side, and I knew that I wouldn't make it until morning. With this, I dug a hole with my bare hands, in the side of the mountain, shaped it into a room, and curled up with a torch at my side, the exit closed and sealed.

I poked my head out, wonderful music played with bells sounded, and the stars spun in the sky as I turned my render up. The moon was 2/3 full, but shining. My ability to see in the dark allowed me observation of the beautiful landscape before me. I hopped out, plain to see the beautiful observation of the world, my eyes wide. And I closed them as a night breeze ruffled my fur. This was my world, and I would stay here until the end. I left the opening exposed, and the music faded away as I curled up inside my warm hole and stared out into the sky, sleep drifting into my mind.

The next morning I traveled next to a wonderful winding river back to what I now call "Spawn forest". It would be my first area of spawn, and I wished that I had instead made my house next to that beautiful V-shaped canyon, but I didn't regret making it next to this bay, that I was now traveling through and going up the ladder to my house. My sense of direction decided not to fail me, and I thanked it. On the way home, spawn forest offered me the long-awaited sheep, but one more wool was still needed. Maybe tomorrow I could get some. So I curled up in my house,  my long tail fluffed up around me, and fell asleep on the hard wood.
P.S. While I was reading and revising, I imagined your story going along with this tune, a nice upbeat melody to mark the beginning of a journey. :3
How did I get here? ಠ_ಠ

My school's water fountain caught on fire. Your argument is invalid.
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Scarikas
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Scarikas »

Ha ha ha
No.
I AM A BANANA.
OFFICIAL FURSONA HERE (I'm finally going to stop changing it)
Click in your free time if you will! ^^
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Extreme360
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Extreme360 »

Scarikas wrote:Ha ha ha
No.
If you're saying no to teh revisions, I SHALL DO THEM ANYWHAR. Cause I don't have much else to do when you're off. :u
How did I get here? ಠ_ಠ

My school's water fountain caught on fire. Your argument is invalid.
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Scarikas
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Scarikas »

I think I'd rather just keep it from my point of view, but thanks anyways xD
I AM A BANANA.
OFFICIAL FURSONA HERE (I'm finally going to stop changing it)
Click in your free time if you will! ^^
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Extreme360
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Re: Aurora (A Minecraft Story)

Post by Extreme360 »

Scarikas wrote:I think I'd rather just keep it from my point of view, but thanks anyways xD
It is from your point of view. :3 But bleh, I haven't worked on revising it in a quite a while.
How did I get here? ಠ_ಠ

My school's water fountain caught on fire. Your argument is invalid.
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